In Case You Missed it-Week of June 29

Photo: efreeze.com

Happy Friday everyone!

I'll make it short and sweet this holiday week.

Here are last week's favorite article links and posts. Feel free to share.

Enjoy!



How to Travel with Another Family and Still Remain Friends

Family Violence Changes Brain Activity

How Pets Teach Kids Empathy & Compassion

Processed Foods and ADHD: Is There a Connection?

Why Teaching Eye Contact as a Behavior Misses the Point

Hydration Tips





Contact: barbara@bodylogique.com

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Swimming Balloon Squid

Squids swim backwards?!?! Yep, they sure do. Of course, my son asked, “How do they see where they’re going?”

“I don’t think they do,” I replied and told him it was probably like when he swims on his back. This was definitely something to ponder.

To begin learning about squid, we read a Step Into Reading Level 3 book by Shirley Raye Redmond.

It’s hard to say what impressed us most about her account of these mysterious creatures:

• That the giant squid’s eyes are as big as a human head.
• Or that if stretched out on a baseball field, one end of the giant mollusk would touch home plate and the other would extend all of the way to the pitcher’s mound.

WHOA, that's cool!

When we wrapped up the book, I rescued a pop-up water bottle lid from the recycling and grabbed a balloon. We headed into the bathroom and filled the tub with water. It was time to simulate how the squid swims.

(This is the second activity we’ve done from Cindy A. Littlefield’s book Awesome Ocean Science! Investigating the Secrets of the Underwater World. It’s jam-packed with great activities for ocean-interested kids.)

Following the instructions, we filled our balloon with water. Then, my son pinched the neck of the balloon closed tightly while I carefully pulled the mouth of the balloon up over the pop-up bottle lid (making sure it was in the closed position before).

Now we put our little squid in the bathtub and pulled the pop top open. Hmmm. What was supposed to happen is the force of the water coming out, would send the balloon shooting backwards through the water, emulating how a squid swims.

Unfortunately, our balloon moved very little, which I credit to the fact that we used a regular party balloon instead of a water balloon, which would have enabled us to fill it up a lot more.

So we improvised.

Instead of filling the balloon with water, I filled it with air. I blew up the balloon, my son pinched the neck tight and I added the closed water bottle lid. Then, we put the balloon in the bathtub. While it didn’t sink beneath the water, the way a true squid swims, when my son popped up the lid, SWOOSH!! the balloon shot backwards all over the tub like a rocket launcher.

Success! 

Sponge-stamped Lungs “Art”

What’s that they say about the best laid plans? Well, whatever it is, it applies to this activity, which did not go quite as I had planned. Regardless, the end result was fantastic and my son still learned a lot.

First, we talked about lungs and read Breathe In, Breathe Out: Learning About Your Lungs. The book provided the right level of detail, without being too complicated, for my son to understand what lungs do, what they’re made of, and why they’re so important.

Then, we painted a pair of lungs that I’d made (download a PDF here). Initially, we tried imprinting the image of bubbles onto our lung pages. Unfortunately, the prints were nearly invisible. (sigh) Time for “Plan B.” 

I grabbed a household sponge and we used it as a stamp with some watered-down red tempera paint. The sponge left a wonderful texture on the lungs.

Afterwards, my son dabbed his finger in blue paint to add the air sacs (alveoli) at the end of the bronchioles.

Since we had to let the lungs dry and the evening was jam-packed, we set the activity aside until the next day.

When we returned, our painted lungs were ready to cut out. Once this was done, my son colored and cut out the windpipe, and then glued all the pieces to posterboard.

Lastly, he added labels for the different parts, referring to a drawing in Nettleton’s book. I had to smile later when I overheard my son explain to his little brother what the picture was. “You have lungs too!” he said enthusiastically.

Summer Yoga Postures for Kids (Our 3 Favorites)

I love taking yoga outside in the summer. There is something so energizing about the sensation of grass against my bare feet & the sun slowly rising over the trees as I move & relax through each sequence in the morning air. When my daughter was little she would  be right next to me, in the evening after dinner, shadowing me for a little while, then running off to catch fireflies as the sun set.

Today's post shares our three favorite summer postures, (modeled by my daughter). Try them outside with your kids or in your office as you take a break from the computer. Remember to keep your breath moving as you try each one and you will find the posture easier to do. (When we hold our breath, we are not just holding breath. We are also holding on to muscle, mental and emotional tension. When we let breath flow, we allow relaxation, awareness, creative ideas, solutions to problems and calm to "come in" to our stressed bodies & brains.)

Seahorse Pose:



Seahorse Pose
Photo: B. Gini

Seahorse (more commonly known as 'Chair Pose') strengthens legs, (particularly thighs), ankles and lower back. Its a good posture for those with flat feet. This posture stimulates digestion, and also strengthens the breathing muscle (diaphragm) and the heart.

Stand with your feet hip width apart. Bend knees as if sitting down. Raise arms up as shown. Breathe in deeply to the count of four and out to the count of four. Remain in posture for 30 seconds to a minute. (You can adapt for children or beginners and have them stay in the pose for 3 breaths. Then increase to 5 breaths, 7 breaths, etc.) Imagine you are a seahorse swimming under the water. (You can vary the pose and strengthen feet by raising up & balancing on your toes while knees are bent. )

To come out of this pose straighten your knees and come back to a standing position with an inhalation, lifting through the arms. Exhale and release your arms to your sides. (Make this more challenging & increase thigh strength by placing & squeezing a ball, balloon or block between knees during the pose.)

Surfer's Pose:

Surfer's Pose
Photo: B. Gini

(More Commonly known as Warrior II) Strengthens the shoulders, lower spine, chest, inner thighs and hips. It also has been known to instill an overall feeling of confidence, improve energy level and increases stamina.

Begin by standing with feet about 3 feet apart (wider than hips.) Turn right foot in towards center about 45 degrees and left foot 90 degrees outward to the left. Stretch out arms and bring up to shoulder height. Keeping spine and trunk straight, turn head to look over left foot (the 90 degree one) and past fingers. Bend left knee so that shin is perpendicular to the ground.  Imagine that you are perfectly balanced as you surf towards the beach.

Stay in posture for 30 seconds to 1 minute or a pre-determined number of breaths. Inhale to come up. Reverse the feet and repeat for the same length of time to the opposite side.

Peace Pose:

Peace Pose
Photo: B. Gini

(Also known as Easy Pose) Improves overall posture and strengthens the trunk from the back down to the hips and pelvis. It is a calming posture and helps relax & recharge the brain and central nervous system.  When practiced regularly it can have a grounding effect on children, and can help improve concentration over longer periods of time.

To do this posture, fold a thick stable blanket several times as shown. Sit with hips to edge of blanket so that they are about 4-5 inches off the ground. (This takes pressure off the hips and makes it easier for children or adults with limited flexibility to sit in this position.) Criss-cross your shins, and slide each foot beneath the opposite knee as you bend knees and fold the legs in toward your torso. (Do not tuck feet in close to body. Leave them about 6-12 inches away from body.)  Relax legs. (You can use a pillow or folded blanket to support knees at first if posture is initially uncomfortable.)


Be sure to keep spine straight, as if the head was being lifted up by a hot air balloon, and bottom grounded to the blanket or floor. Hands on knees and always alternate the order in which the legs are crossed. Sit quietly and notice each part of your body, from your toes up to your head. Imagine that each breath comes in and out of that body part, relaxing and re-charging it.  (This posture can also be adapted to be done while seated in a chair with feet flat on floor and spine against back of chair.)


Do you have a favorite summer (traditional or non-traditional) posture or stretch? Tell us what it is in the comments below!


Find a downloadable version of this article to use in the classroon or at camp:
BodyLogique.com

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to purcahse our books on Amazon

Questions?  please e-mail: barbara@bodylogique.com

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Are Our Kids Over-Praised and Under-Challenged?

Photo: girlguides.ca

I attended my teen age niece's recital this weekend. The one thing that struck me the most in each of the 50 or so numbers was that none of the kids looked like they had any energy or like they were having any fun. Their performances and the overall tone of the whole recital reflected that.

My niece knew it was not the best they could have done and was very distressed over it. The dance steps were there, and they were strung together but there was no energy nor passion behind them.

After listening to my niece and  and some of her friends, it was determined that the dance teachers while generous with positive reinforcement & praise, rarely corrected their technique, posture or stage presence. They were always told that they looked "awesome". The girls knew after their performance that something lacked and one them said " I wish someone had told us that we looked sloppy. None of it felt right. I'm so embarrassed". What should have been a happy and fun event turned into an upsetting yet eye opening experience for them all.

Alfie Kohn, author of the book “Punished by Rewards,” has said that most praise, especially for effort alone, encourages children to become “praise junkies” and more dependent on outside feedback rather than helping to cultivate their own awareness, sense of inner judgment and self-motivation. Too much praise deters them from learning more and from wanting to do their very best.

Have we become so obsessed with trying to make kids 'feel good' about themselves and over-praising them that we’ve lost sight of how to challenge & help them to build the actual skills they need to achieve, excel and ultimately enjoy activities more?

In the yoga community and especially with special needs children, there is a tendency towards what I call the obligatory "Good Job" syndrome, and a push towards "non-competitive" games and activities. I have often questioned whether this is really helping kids in the long run? I always like to bring an element of calculated challenge and fun competition into my classes so that the kids stay motivated and engaged. Otherwise, I am just making them sit on a piece of recycled rubber, crawl & stand around like animals or trees and imposing abstract ideas on them that mean nothing in their world outside of the studio.

I am seeing in my own experience, that although our intentions are good, and we want to include everyone, and not cause a child to become upset, disappointed & de-motivated, we might want to re-think our approach. We have gone to an extreme with the 'self-esteem movement' and we need to remember that telling our kids they are great does not make it true. In their hearts, our kids know when they have done their best and when they have not. We do them a huge dis-service by lying to them and training them to expect praise. Instead of building confidence & self-esteem, we are making them feel more insecure about themselves, their own abilities and how others see them.

The truth is, challenges, competitions, winning, losing, doing our best or being average does matter in the real world, and we all have to live in the real world at some point. When we achieve a goal or 'win' a competition, we know we have done our best. We feel it and have a sense of achievement and confidence. When we fail or lose, we know we need to examine where we could improve and do better next time. The challenge lies in our own self-improvement. We need to teach kids that. We need to stop confusing "challenge" and "competition" with 'feeling insecure over losing' & 'fearing that others are somehow better',  because they are not the same thing. We need to stop giving out vague and insincere praise.

By challenging and working the muscles of our bodies, they will grow and become stronger. A stronger muscle helps us do more. Our minds and our characters work in the same way: They both need a variety of challenges through experience in order to grow.

As was demonstrated by the recital I attended, it is vital for parents and teachers to be clear with children about what an exceptional, first rate performance looks like so they know what to aim for:

Unhelpful: 
It looked fantastic & I think you did a great job! You were robbed! Those judges must be blind!

Helpful:
Try bringing your arms up higher. That's better. Stand tall and pull your arms in towards your center when you spin to help your balance. How does that feel now. That looks better. OK,do it again.

Helping kids & teenagers, especially those with special needs, to learn from their mistakes and failures is far more constructive and a more practical life skill than coming up with excuses for falling short. Adaptations are fine and sometimes very necessary, but over-accommodation and over-praise tells a child that we don't trust them to improve and that they are not important enough to know the truth. It reveals to them our own doubts and fears about their abilities and in effect tells them to not bother trying. We think we are keeping them 'safe' but ultimately, we are placing them in a more vulnerable position.
 
I have found that kids respect the truth and if you give them a clear and reasonably challenging target, and do it in the spirit of fun, they will move towards it. This is true for physical skills, math, reading, writing, dance, sports or any other activity that they are engaging in and its true for most children regardless of their abilities.
 
A perfect example of this is the Special Olympics programs. If you have never witnessed an event, I urge you to find a local one and just watch. Its inspiring and humbling. Recently, athlete leaders have suggested that the organization may have actually set expectations for their athletes too low and needs to raise them. While Special Olympics continues to offer opportunities to athletes of all ability levels, they are additionally embracing a new model that emphasizes health & sports based activities, training & education that challenges &  encourages each athlete to achieve his or her own personal best.

Self esteem cannot be given through empty, false praise and cannot be imposed on kids externally in any way. It cannot be handed to them in a gift bag with a pretty bow or through flattering words. It can only be earned by the individual through overcoming challenges, learning from mistakes and expecting them to do their very best.


 
How do you keep yourself, your students, dancers or athletes motivated & challenged to do their best?  Do you ever tell them they did "great" when they really didn't?  Tell us in the comments below.
 
 
 
 
Related:
 
 
Spontaneous Engagement Through Play
 
 
A recent article in the Washington Post discusses how many schools are also getting away from the practice of over-praising.  Read article here: Self-Esteem Boosting is Losing Favor to Rigor, Finely Tuned Praise



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Post-It Page Marker Math

I love Post-It® notes. So does my son. I’m not sure what either of us thinks is so special about them, but whenever our learning activities involve Post-Its, we BOTH have fun. This activity is no exception.

I bought a pack of multi-colored Post-It Page Markers at the store and designed three pages for my son to stick them to. Each page has a different number on it (i.e. 12, 25, 60).

On the Post-Its I wrote a variety of math problems (addition, subtraction, and even a few easy multiplication ones). Each pad of page markers had problems with answers that matched to different pages.

It was up to my son to answer the problem and stick the Post-It Page Marker to the right page, giving the lion a mane, the hedgehog quills, or the child hair.

My son had loads of fun with this activity, pushing himself to get each problem right. When he answered wrong, he knew it. There was no page for that marker! He recalculated, and found the marker’s home.

My son solved 33 problems doing this activity (15 for the lion page, 10 for the hedgehog, and 8 for the child)!!

Want to do this activity with only one page? Simply write a variety of problems, many with the answer that’s on the page and other problems with answers that are not. Challenge your child to match-up the right problems and reserve the ones with the wrong answers.

Download the pages I made here.

This Week: In Case You Missed it (June -18-22



Photo: thehotairballooning.com 

 Hello everyone and a very happy Friday! This week marked the official transition from the end of the school year to the beginning of summer. Congratulations to all of the graduates and families. We wish you a safe, happy and productive summer!

We are looking forward to selecting 6 winners of our S.M.Art Story™ giveaway on Monday, so be sure to enter !

(Use this link to get the information. )

I had some requests this week for specific topics relating to summer camps and activities, so this week I have posted the relevant articles from this blog that pertain to the most requested information from this week. Many of these posts have outside links as well. If you still can't find the information you need, please contact me by leaving a comment below or by e-mailing barbara@bodylogique.com

Have a great weekend!

~Barbara



Summer Sensory Scavenger Hunt

Preventing Summer Learning Loss

Play Encourages Spontaneous Engagement

Aromatherapy and Autism

The Importance of Hydration

Building Core Strength Through Movement Games

Beach Yoga

Sand Dollar Shakers

You Be the Author & Illustrator [Ants Activity]

It’s a guarantee that any time we’re outside, we’ll stop to stare at the ants. My kids have always seemed fascinated by these tiniest of insects in our driveway.

The other day, my son and I read a great book about an ant walking along a railroad track and the switchman determined to save him from a seemingly inevitable head-on crash with an approaching train.

Its rhyming text has a rhythm, its ending is comical, and the book’s illustrations are wildly expressive and imaginative. If you’re looking for a fun fiction picture book about an adventuresome ant, this certainly fits the bill.

Download this PDF here.
Print pages 1 and 2 and flip over.
Print pages 3 and 4 on the back.
Fold and staple.

When we’d finished reading, I flipped back a few pages and asked my son to show me the rhyming words, pointing out that they were the last words in each line. Now it was time for my son to write his own rhyming ant story!

I gave him a book I’d created, printed on cardstock, folded, and stapled in the middle.

We started with the “illustrations” first. My son used an ink pad and his fingerprint to make ants on each page of the book (i.e. one ant on the first page, two on the second, etc.). He simply lined three fingerprints up and drew on antennae and legs. Voila, ants!

Now that the ants were added, it was time for some creative writing. Each page of the book I made has a beginning line that ends in the number of ants on that page. It was up to my son to think of a word that rhymed with those numbers and write a sentence where the rhyming word would fall at the end.

My son can easily match rhyming words into pairs, but coming up with them on his own was a challenge. I had to help him a little with clues. As we worked on the pages, I reminded him that the story was a progression. For example, he couldn’t say the ants saw something blue on page two and never tell readers what blue thing they saw on future pages; the reader would be left wondering.

This was a lot of brainstorming and more writing than son would normally do, but he stayed at it and was so proud of the finished book that he called a “meeting” at bedtime to read it aloud to the entire family. Success!

To reward my son for all his writing, we also made one of the characters from his book – Bob the Ant out of spray-painted plastic spoons, black pipe cleaners, and two googly eyes.

You can find the complete directions for this craft on Danielle's Place of Crafts and Activities on the Bug and Insect Crafts for Kids page. (Variation: We didn’t cut our spoons, but rather just layered one on top of the other.)

Listening Pose (Seated Savasana)

Peace Pose

I think most of us who teach or practice yoga would agree that the best part of a yoga class is the end - Savasana -where all outer body movement ceases and we allow ourselves to tune in to our inner bodies.

Years ago when I first began teaching children's yoga, it was a challenge to get 10-15 children to actually lie still and quiet so that they could tune into their inner world.  Through trial and error, I learned how to creatively take the energy they were sending out to me and direct  it to where I wanted them to be. I often use the imagery of a Starfish lying in the sand at the bottom of the ocean as our ending savasana pose. Recently, I've been experimenting with other positions to encourage the tuning in and relaxation of the body, in environments other than the yoga studio or sensory room. I've been working on postures for an environment that children are in a good portion of the time: a classroom.

Starfish pose or traditional savasana (corpse pose) may not be a posture that a child can use when in a typical classroom. If the classroom is an inclusion room, this may not be possible either due to space restrictions or disruption. However, a student can be taught to modify a different, more practical posture and use an imagery that will not be disruptive to a teacher or to other students. One that I like to use is "Peace Pose" (pictured at top left).

One does not need a mat and one does not need to sit cross legged to practice it. You can do this seated in a chair. Be sure to keep spine straight (or against the back of the chair) hands on knees, feet flat on floor and breathe in & out from the belly slowly and deeply. Imagine breathing in Peace and breathing out stress/confusion/ frustration or whatever it is we are trying to get control of.

We can imagine we breathe in what we want and out what we no longer  need.  I also have the kids imagine they are breathing into each part of the body, starting at toes and going all the way up to their hair. As their breath flows out and into the atmosphere, they imagine, (as one student puts it)  all 'the bad stuff going with it'!

Peace Pose:
Adapted to a therapy ball

Students (and teachers) can use this technique for a variety of self-regulation purposes: to remain calm, to solve problems, to think before acting, to prepare for a transition or to feel more grounded, focused, safe and confident.

Depending on the student, group or what specific resonance or association you want the posture to have you could call it:

• Peace Pose
• Listening Pose
• Calm Pose
• Quiet Pose
• Easy Pose
• Statue Pose
• Thinking Pose
• Seated Savasana

Just be sure to keep consistent with what you name it.

By teaching children that they can feel calm & safe when sitting on a bus, in a movie theater, at their desks or anywhere, we broaden their concentration & stress management skills and help them become more self reliant and adaptable to the many changes and challenges that Life holds.




Contact: Barbara@bodylogique.com




Related Articles:


Peace Garden Guided Imagery


The Breathing Ball (Video)


Glitter Ball (Video)


Starfish Guided Imagery

*Use this link

to purchase our books on Amazon

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Making Waves ... in a bottle

We are totally land-locked here in the Midwest. To say that the ripples of water on the surface of lake water are waves is downright ridiculous; but that's the closest thing we've got to them. Perhaps this is why my son has a fascination with the ocean, because it’s a complete mystery to him.

To teach him about ocean waves, first we read a great non-fiction book. This is the second time we’ve read a book from the Tell Me Why, Tell Me How series (the last time was when we learned about the seasons changing). Wil Mara’s book has LOADS of great information, perhaps a little more than we needed! We only read the first 15 pages.

My favorite light-bulb moment was when I read aloud “A wave does not really start in the water, but in the sky!” and my son burst out with a “what?!?” We read more. Wind energy makes waves!

Mara’s book also taught us the names for a wave’s highest and lowest points.

Now it was time to make some waves!

What you need

A clear, thin-necked bottle with a cap (I used a bottle of sparkling lemonade.)

Corn Syrup

Vegetable oil

Blue food coloring

What to do

Pour corn syrup into the bottle until it’s about 1/5^thfull. Add a drop of blue food coloring. Swirl the bottle to mix the food coloring into the syrup. Then, add the same amount of vegetable oil to the bottle.

Now put the cap on.

Turn the bottle on its side and slowly lower the neck. Watch the bottom blue syrup layer as a small wave builds and crests in the neck (which is your pretend beach) of the bottle. Now slowly lower it back down, sending the wave back out to the ocean.

Oh yeah. This was fun!

CREDIT: The “Breakers in a Bottle” idea came from Cindy A. Littlefield’s book Awesome Ocean Science! Investigating the Secrets of the Underwater World. This book is 113 pages of hands-on activities all about the ocean. There's no telling how much fun you can have with your kids, thanks to this book!

Driveway Dice Roll Board Game

It’s summer. What are we doing inside, right?!? This little activity takes our math lesson outdoors. Put on the sunscreen and get ready for some subtraction and addition fun!

Prep

Take an empty cube-shaped tissue box and cover it with posterboard. Attach dot label stickers to the sides to mimic a die (I had some left over from our Noun Clown activity). Don't have dot stickers? Color some dots with a magic marker! Now cover the box with clear household contact paper for added durability and to keep the die somewhat clean.

Draw a game board on your driveway with sidewalk chalk. Mark the start and finish clearly. For older kids, make lots of spaces (ours had 47); for younger kids with shorter attention spans or early addition/subtraction skills, keep the board shorter.

Add small numbers in one corner of each space. Then, at random, add “-3, +4, -6, +2,” etc. in some of the board's spaces.

Now you’re ready to play.

How to Play

Players stand at the start and roll the die. Whatever number is on top when the die lands, is the number of spaces the player moves. In the player lands on a space with a plus or minus, they must move the number of spaces noted (i.e. if a player rolls a six, moves six space, and the sixth space says “-2,” they must move back two spaces).

The player can only move forward or backward once per roll. In other words, in the example above, if the player moved back two and that space read “+4,” they would not move again.

As the player moves they should speak the problem created out loud before or as they’re moving. So if a player is on space 14 and they roll a six, they should say, “14 + 6 = 20.”

Players take turns rolling the die and moving forward and backwards on the driveway game board (it helps if you have a person willing to fetch the die for players; little brother LOVED doing this!).

The first player to the finish wins!

In Case you Missed It: Friday, June 15

Photo by Lisa DeLuca
spraygraphic.com

Well The end of the week is finally here. It was a productive one for me, and an enlightening one as well. It was the last week of school for many  and the start of some summer adventures for others!

This week marked a few milestones as well: my daughter successfully finished the 6th grade; my sons and my brother all turned a year older; I am on the verge of publishing my first two S.M.Art Story™ expanded curricula on Amazon; AND my blog has reached over 100,000 views!  I want to thank my readers and community partners for your inspiration, feedback and support of adaptive movement programming for kids. Without you, this program and these books would not exist.!

As a Thank You and to celebrate these exciting events, I will be giving away six copies (3 of each title) of my soon to be published S.M.Art Story™ books to six lucky winners! (Why six you ask? Well, June is the 6th month!)

Dragonfly's Adventure and Ocean Surf-ari:
2 of our S.M.Art Story™ Series books

What is a S.M.Art Story™?  Its a BodyLogique® Exclusive! Themed, yoga-based adaptive curriculum series for educators, therapists, yoga teachers & families to use as supplemental materials for children ages five to ten. They are fun, educational, therapeutic and completely user friendly. (You do not need to have yoga experience to use them.) They have been used (e-book version) in classrooms, camps, sensory rooms and home school programs all over the country.

Each curriculum aligns with core educational standards, national standards for PE, and supports health, well being, inclusion, sensory integration, social development & whole child learning. In addition, 10% of all sales help support our community yoga scholarship and helps to support our non-profit community partners.


Both of these expanded editions contain 3 complete lesson plans, photos, adaptive activities, games and dozens of classroom friendly yoga-based techniques for keeping kids of all abilities engaged, focused and calm. Both are in the final edit stages and will be available June 30 on Amazon, to educators, therapists and others who want to learn and use these effective practices. (The limited edition digital version is available here.)  We currently have plans for 12 - 15 books in the series and the next books in the series, "Sun Stretch" and "Star Quest" are due to be released over the summer.

If you would like to enter to win one of our S.M.Art Story™ books, you have two choices:

1)  leave a comment below (along with your current e-mail address so we can get in touch with you when you win!)
2) 'Like' us on Facebook or Twitter and leave a comment. (If you like us on both, your name will be entered 2 times!)

Winners will be selected by random drawing on Monday, June 25, 2012.

We invite you to   Subscribe to S.M.Art Kids / Healthy Kids by Email so you can receive up-to date release information, informative blog articles, workshop schedule and giveaway information right to your inbox, and we love connecting with other educators therapists and parents on Facebook and Twitter  if that is more your speed.

I also want to take a moment and wish my dad, and all of our dads a very restful & Happy Father's Day!

Here are this week's In Case You Missed It posts. Enjoy!


Please report broken links to:  barbara@bodylogique.com






A Bit of Fatherly Advice  (Stuart Duncan)

The ABC's of Assistive Technology (Valley Forge Educational Services)

Disability and Hate Crime (Autism Mumma Jeanette)

Playwork, Play Deprivation, and Play (The Journal of Play)

Constructive Fidgeting for Self Regulation (BodyLogique)

Opinion: Children Need Nature, not Facebook (Rich Louv via Children and Nature Network)






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Wearing Lincoln’s Hat

When my son started his presidential dollar coin collection, an interest in the presidents was ignited. At a recent trip to an area presidential museum, his grandmother bought him a deck of cards with all the presidents. Of all the trinkets he could have picked out, that’s what he wanted. I love that about him.

To take his interest beyond just their names and order in the lineage of presidents, I checked out a book on my absolute favorite president: Abraham Lincoln. Looking at Lincoln isn’t just another boring book, it’s a journey of discovery.

A child spots a man while on a walk that reminds her of someone but she can’t recall just who until she pays for breakfast with a five-dollar bill. Eureka! The man she saw looked like our 16^thpresident, Abraham Lincoln! Curious, she heads to the library to do a little research. The book reveals all her discoveries about his life, his contribution to the history of the United States, his death, and the Washington, D. C. Lincoln Memorial.

The book pushed us into lots of heavy discussions about things like what it means to be poor, what slavery was, and what the civil war was about. I didn’t try to overwhelm him with detailed explanations, remembering that he’s only almost-seven years old. I could tell my son was really listening and thinking when he said, “People don’t have slaves today, do they?” We could have stopped our learning there and I would have chalked this whole activity up as a success.

But we didn’t. Instead we made a hat like Lincoln used to wear.

It’s amazing what you can do with two pieces of black posterboard, some gray ribbon, and a low-temp glue gun. Here’s how we did it!

Cut a rectangle of black posterboard (1) so it’s slightly larger than the circumference of your child’s head.

Draw two lines roughly an inch and a half away from the edge of each long side of the rectangle. Make several cuts straight in up to the line on each side, approximately ¾-inch apart. If you’ve done it right, your rectangle will have fringe (2).

Roll your rectangle into a tube and glue together (3). Gently trace the circle formed by the tube onto another piece of black posterboard. Set that aside for later.

On one end of the tube, fold the fringe back (4); this is the base of the hat. On the other end, fold the fringe flaps in for the top of your hat (5).

Now cut out the circle you drew earlier. Then trace that circle again inside a larger circle (we traced a dinner plate to make our outer circle [6]). Now cut both out. The small circle is the top of your hat. The donut-shaped circle is the base (or brim of your hat).

Then slide the donut-shaped circle down the hat (7). You may need to re-trim the inside circle to make it bigger. It should be snug.

Tip the hat over and add dots of glue to the flaps (8). An adult should carefully press down onto the donut brim (even though it's a low-temp glue gun, it's still hot!). If your flaps stick out past the brim, trim the excess away.

Add glue to the fringe flaps at the top of your hat (9) and attach the small circle.

Now add a wide gray ribbon around the base of the hat, above the brim.

Before our learning time ended, I gave my son some small business card-sized “Abraham Lincoln …” slips of paper.

Download a PDF of the Abraham Lincoln Fact Recording Cards here.

It was up to him to complete the sentence. He wrote out six sentences. Abraham Lincoln …

was tall.

liked reading.

was kicked by a mule.

was 16^th president.

was shot.

Because Maira Kalman’s book shared that Abe used to write notes and stuff them inside his hat, we glued our fact slips onto the bottom side of our hat’s brim.

When his father came home, my son put on the hat to show him (it may be just a wee bit taller than Lincoln’s). Then he promptly took off his hat and read the facts to share what he’d learned. He was so excited!

Ahimsa: Learning What We Live

Those of you who read my blog regularly know that I usually keep things on a positive note, however, sometimes conflict, adversity and pain can be our own greatest teachers and this is one of those times. I'm going to share with you an experience that has many teaching moments.
 
Yesterday was my daughter's last day of 6th grade. Instead of being a happy day of looking forward to summer activities with friends, it was mostly stressful and upsetting.

This week, two girls she considered friends, spread a rumor designed to be damaging  to her other friendships. Subsequently, they convinced  several other classmates to perpetuate the rumor and to join in on taunting my daughter.

It escalated to the point that both boys and girls in higher grades, who she didn't even know, were coming up to her asking if the rumor was true. At first she explained that it was a lie, and as more questioned her, she ended up telling them [sarcastically] "Why yes. Its 100% true...and why does it matter to you? Because you don't have a life? or a mind of your own?"

Then the girls did the same thing to another girl who came to my daughter's defense.

She was concerned for and confused by the unprovoked attack and attempted to set things right by talking with the girls (neither responded to her messages) and even appealed (respectfully) to each girl's mother for some help. Neither girl took any responsibility and neither apologized. While one mother was very concerned and apologetic the other was dismissive.  Each girl blamed other classmates who were not even in school the day this began.

This is not the first incident this year, but it is the worst. To say my daughter is hurt, embarrassed and devastated is an understatement. To say that I am disappointed in these two girls doesn't even begin to scratch the surface.

I feel her pain as my own as I am again, a shy, awkward 6th grader being taunted and humiliated by my own classmates. I am at the same time reminded of the shame and guilt I felt the following year after I joined in taunting a classmate who, as I now understand, had several learning and emotional problems. I am now wondering how do I remain objective and non-judgemental as a mother  and help my daughter approach this whole incident in the best way possible?

My daughter is more outgoing, mature and socially aware than I was at that age and I am trying to give her the right kind of support, and keep perspective, but how do I put perspective on the pain of non-acceptance, betrayal, dishonesty? How do I even begin to teach her to tolerate the intolerant? Or should I?

There is a clear difference between tolerating one who is different and allowing others to mistreat us. They are not the same thing. It is never ok for anyone to mistreat us, in words or actions. We need to carefully model this and be aware of our own unhealthy relationships, fears, attitudes & behaviors that will ultimately influence our kid's behaviors even if we don't intend for them to.

I strive to follow the Golden Rule and embrace the guiding principles of my own yoga practice - the 'Yamas' (part of the code of conduct) and work them in to all of my classes. I firmly believe - and I teach - that Ahimsa - non-violence in action and in words -  is one of the principles that we need a lot more practice with.

*Ahimsa is a term that means we are to do no harm. Literally, it means the 'avoidance of violence'  and applies to words thoughts and actions. It encompasses kindness, compassion and avoiding violence towards all living things (including animals). It indicates that all of life is connected and respects all beings as a part of a huge unity.

I offer advice to so many kids who are taunted and abused at school. (Yes, I said abused. I am hesitant to use the term 'bullying', as I feel it is a weak, overused, misinterpreted and outdated word. This behavior goes beyond that. It is abusive & manipulative. If adults did this to each other in the workplace, it would be called verbal assault, harassment, abuse, hostile environment, slander, etc. yet when our kids do it the best we can come up with is 'bullying'?  I feel it deserves  a better description so let's call it what it really is. )

In spite of good intentions, I see how sometimes my advice really is ineffective to kids in terms of solving the much bigger problem that is the root cause of this type of behavior. In spite of being armed with a litany of peaceful, philosophical adages such as, "well a real friend wouldn't treat you like that..." and "they must feel really badly about themselves to do that to someone else...", when we get right down to it, those words do nothing to take away that pain, stop the behavior and it does not give any instruction as to how to defend oneself from such an attack and how to proceed  afterwards. Kids don't want to hear principles and philosophies. They want to know- to feel - that they are loved & supported by someone they can trust. They want to belong with a group of loyal friends that accepts them for who they are.They want answers- to know how to stop the behavior and if they can't do that, they want to know how to stop the pain.

In this moment I had no clear answers for my daughter, but I listened as objectively as I could. I watched her closely so she could have room to come up with her own answers. As a result of this event, my daughter decided to end the friendships and seek out other girls that aligned with her own definition of  'friend'.  She is now looking at her other classmates in a new light, including those that are not quite as 'flashy' and not perceived as 'cool'. I gently planted that seed and she is nurturing it. As painful as this was, she is learning more about herself and the kind of person she wants to be. She is understanding how important it is to strive for her own goals and to help others do the same along the way. She is learning that sometimes the most compassionate thing you can do for others-and yourself-is to cut ties and set free those who don't support our own progress.

After some asking around, she found out that the rumor had been started for the purpose of discouraging the attention of a boy she liked. (The girls didn't want the boy to like my daughter back). So they told everyone she was a 'lesbian', as if that would make her 'off limits' to the boy and somehow make her less. They used this 'label' as a weapon, in an attempt to alienate, and to isolate her; to make her an outcast among other intolerant peers, and with the intent of making her appear to be a 'bad person'.

I am disturbed at the malicious intent of the whole lie. My daughter is shocked that these girls are purposefully hurtful, apparently biased, massively insecure, uninformed, ignorant & intolerant. (All her own words except 'uninformed'. She used the word 'stupid'.) She is mostly upset that she didn't see these character flaws sooner.

Since she was 7, my daughter has worked with me in my programs, with many children: those with special needs, those from different cultures & those with non-traditional families. I wanted her to be exposed to as many people as possible so that she could learn something from each of them. She is one of the most compassionate, forgiving and accepting girls of her age that I have ever known.  She has a mouth and is not afraid to use it when she sees and injustice and she is just as quick to give someone encouragement when they need it the most. Her tolerance is one of her many strengths. However, many her age see this as her weakness and take full advantage of it in a bad way. She is learning through these painful experiences not only how to stand her ground, but also how to set and enforce boundaries and I am so proud of the way she is navigating through these complex relationships

You may be familiar with the poem by Dorothey Law Nolte (Children Learn What They Live):

"... If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn. If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient..."

I find this to be so true. Our kids don't just make these things up and get these attitudes and behaviors incidentally. They are influenced by adults in their lives, TV, unsupervised social network behaviors and in the one-on-one interactions of others. They learn to be fearful, insecure, intolerant. They learn to attack each other - verbally or otherwise when they feel that they are not enough. If we don't do a better job in guiding & supporting them in working on themselves, taking responsibility for their actions & in being more tolerant of everyone around them, then we are doing them and ultimately our entire society a huge disservice.

They need to understand that we all have to live here together regardless of where we are in our personal evolutions and whether or not we like it. This life will not adjust to us and it is not an exclusive club just for one type of  'kind'. There are all kinds of people in this world and we can learn so much from each other. Some will be friends and some will rub us the wrong way. Some we will choose to not interact with at all.  Tolerance does not make one weak, in fact, it can open more doors for all of us than we ever imagined.

We rely and depend on each other to some degree. All of us are connected and what you do to another,  you do to yourself. Some call it Karma and I call it cause and effect.

While we will not always, (nor do we have to), agree with, or accept what others do (and how they live), we have to remember that ahimsa & tolerance are life skills that transcend gender, age, special needs, culture, sexual preferences and lifestyles. They are principles that we all would do well to work on in ourselves and instill in all of the kids who we love and support.

Our girls are sending us an urgent message and we all need to listen and respond.


How will you  respond?


 

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*(Ahimsa recognizes self-defense when necessary, as a sign of a strong spirit. We all have a right to be safe and can and should defend ourselves when our personal well-being is threatened.)