One child, sitting in the back near me, became very distressed and said,"But I tried that before and every time I try to empty my mind, I just can't stop thinking. The thoughts just keep coming and coming and they just don't stop! How do I get them to stop?"
I could understand his anxiety. Its ridiculous (and a little scary) to think of the mind not thinking. In fact, it doesn't make any sense at all.
While I know that teacher meant well, and was trying to re-assure him when she replied "Just try", the words and manner in which she was showing them had just the opposite effect of what it should have. Although there was just one boy who asked how to empty his mind, I wonder how many others in that group wondered the same thing?
The biggest myth of meditation is that our minds need to be empty. The single purpose of the mind is to think. A more accurate description of meditation is that we are becoming aware of or directing or focusing our thoughts. We can focus on a sound, a color, a single image, our breath, an experience and that is what brings awareness, slows our racing and random thoughts down, reduces stress and allows us to function more efficiently.
We have to keep in mind (pun intended) that there are several styles of meditation, and, when teaching children, we have to be mindful of the type and manner in which we teach them. Sometimes we say meditation when we really mean relaxation which is related, but not the same thing. These useful techniques must be taught in a kid-friendly step by step manner or they will not be able to be understood and utilized effectively. Children will not have the same experience as an adult will so we have to break it down and help them have their own experience and understand what uses these techniques have.
Right now there is a huge push for mindfulness in schools. But we need to first understand exactly what it is we are teaching and for what purpose before we start doing it, or we run the risk of:
1) no one taking any of it seriously
2) of causing more anxiety as I spoke of at the beginning of this post
3) giving the impression that the techniques don't work or cannot be taught to children, (and we know neither of these are true!)
Meditation is, generally defined:
"Meditation refers to a family of self-regulation practices that focus on training attention and awareness in order to bring mental processes under greater voluntary control and thereby foster general mental well-being and development and/or specific capacities such as calm, clarity, and concentration..."
For our purposes, this can be broken down further in to two main categories:
- Concentrative Meditation: (Focused Attention): Voluntarily being attentive to and focusing on a particular object
- Mindful Meditation: (Open Monitoring (OM) ): focusing on moment to moment experiences, and learning how to be aware and not react to them
In either type, the observer is fully aware and participating in the process. Each type has a specific purpose & will have specific effects on the brain and body.
So how do you know which one to teach and use with children? The answer is that it really depends on the children.
The first thing to remember is to keep it simple and not too serious. It needs an element of fun to be effective with kids. Make it a game. I call it "Imagery" or the "Imagine Game" or the "Concentration Game".
Meditation & mindfulness, are big, fancy words for little kids and its doubtful that they will have any school teacher that will tell them to "please be mindful of your behavior" or to "meditate on these math problems..." They will however hear a teacher tell them to concentrate; focus; pay attention. So we need to define why we want to teach them the techniques and then teach them in simple common language so they can understand what it is that they are learning to do.
Don't rush the process and allow children to come to conclusions and realizations on their own. I've listed 4 basic steps and some activities below that I have found effective. Give each step as much time as needed for each child to grasp the concept before taking it up to the next level. Some children may stay at one level and that is fine too.
Consider the outcome you are intending, along with the age, maturity level and abilities of each child before selecting and doing these or any other mindful/meditation activities:
1) Children relate better to tangibles rather than abstract concepts, so the first step is to teach them to focus on an object. I like to use natural objects such as shells, stones, leaves, flowers, etc. Have each child select one from an array and then have them really observe the color, shape, unique qualities and other details they can visually identify about it. Do this for a few minutes. Then have them place all the objects in a bowl, and mix them up. Pass the bowl around and one by one, see if they can retrieve their own object again.
2) You can then have them focus on sounds, sensations or smells in the same way: (sounds) instrumental music, ocean or rain forest, their own breath; (sensation) a feather brushed across their arm or leg, the feeling of a sea shell in their hand; (smell) spearmint plants, coffee beans, cookies baking or chamomile tea bags. Have them describe how that sound, sensation, or smell makes them feel,or what it reminds them of (A place or an experience.)
3) Next try some simple guided imagery, of a place where they feel happy and safe, such as grandma's house, the beach, playground, zoo, aquarium, garden, amusement park, etc. Allow them to form an image in their mind and imagine it as detailed as they can for a specified amount of time (ex: 5 minutes) Then have them share their imagery with the group, verbally or by journaling.
4) Then have them work on thinking of an event that made them feel sad, such as an argument with a friend or a favorite toy that broke. Have them imagine that they are watching the experience or event from inside a big window and the event is taking place outside of the window. Take them through the experience and have them imagine how they would like to see the situation resolved. Have them 'see' that resolution happen outside the window.
In my experience, it is only after a progression of steps, such as those described above have been introduced and practiced, does a child start to understand how to use these techniques in the present moment.
Its not difficult to teach meditation techniques to children-all children, no matter what their abilities- but it does need to be taught patiently and in a thoughtful practical manner, (and always in the spirit of fun), so they can retain and apply the techniques independently whenever they need them the most.
Would you like to help your child recognize the signs of stress and teach them how to address it independently?
Calm and Connected is a step by step resource for parents and educators with dozens of class and kid-friendly meditation games activities & techniques to use for teaching children how to improve their sense of self calm & maintain better focus.
Learn more and order your copy here.
For Further Discussion:
Do you think mindfulness & other forms of meditation is beneficial to kids and should be taught in schools?Why or why not?
At what age should children start to learn these techniques?
Please leave your thoughts in the comments below.
Related Articles:
Self Calming in the Peace Garden
The Art of Engagement
Sensory Scavenger Hunt
Labyrinth Adventures
Subscribe to S.M.Art Kids / Healthy Kids by Email
Contact: barbara@bodylogique.com
Posts
0 comments:
Post a Comment